


and they were gone, not with a bang, but with a whimper

by Acexual_Attorney



Category: Block B
Genre: Crack, Spring Cleaning, kyunghyo is a thing kinda, not finished never going to be finished, sorry lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 11:42:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10189157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Acexual_Attorney/pseuds/Acexual_Attorney
Summary: the dorm team is once again forced to go through their worst nightmare curtosy of their most evil hyung, aka Spring Cleaningthis isnt finished and probably never will be whoops lol





	

**Author's Note:**

> so i was looking thru my drafts and i found this, which i wrote over a year ago but never finished and honestly idk where i was going w/ it so here have it ill probs never finish it but the Public can take it from me idc

"Get up."

Kyung let out what he hoped was a coherent response of "five more minutes, mom," but it probably sounded more like "fhhhv mmmr mmhnssss mmaaaa."

"Don't make me dump water on you."

With the threat of being soaked in his own bed, Kyung opened his eyes. After blinking away the sleep that blurred his vision, he was greeted with the very unpleasant face of Lee Taeil. Kyung was surprised. Usually Taeil didn't get out of bed until well into the afternoon unless they had a schedule.

Instead of vocalizing his confusion, though, he just groaned, "Hyuuuung", rolled over, and said into his pillow, "It's too early."

"It's nine, Jaehyo's already up, and if you don't get up right now, I'll get him to help me beat you up," Taeil voice held no humor and Kyung knew Jaehyo would jump at the chance to finally kick his ass.

"Your evil," was the only thing Kyung said before begrudgingly rolling back over and sitting up.

"Hurry up and get dressed, we're going to be busy today," Taeil patted Kyung leg happily and then walked out of the room. He didn't even close the door behind him, knowing that if he did, Kyung would just fall back asleep.

Kyung grumbled to himself as he threw his comforter off of himself and went to close the door so he could change in peace. Why Taeil was up so early was a wonder to him. Usually it took the force of four men (or a very determined Jiho and Jihoon) to wake him up, and that was on a good day.

Finally dressed, Kyung left his room to go find Taeil and Jaehyo. He saw Jaehyo sitting at the kitchen table, looking like a corpse with a cup of half-drunk coffee in his hands. The coffee was even a lighter color than Jaehyo's skin, and was probably more creamer than coffee since, quote, "coffee tastes like dirt." Taeil, though, was nowhere to be seen.

"Where's Taeil?" Kyung asked. The fucker better not had left after forcing him to wake up.

Instead of answering his question, Jaehyo simply asked, "Do you know what today is?"

Only slightly fazed by Jaehyo's out-of-the-blue question, Kyung searching his memory for the day's date. Yesterday was the third, so that meant today was "February 4th?" Kyung didn't mean for it to come out as a question, but he was still a little confused on why the date was important.

Jaehyo nodded and gave Kyung a very sad look. It suddenly dawned on him and he visibly paled.

"Oh no," Kyung whispered. Jaehyo gave a solemn, affirming nod and a sigh.

Taeil came into the room then, carrying two buckets full of cleaning supplies.

"Spring Cleaning," they all said in unison. Jaehyo gazed sadly into his coffee, Taeil set down the buckets, and Kyung was getting ready to bolt.

"Hyung, I'm sorry, but I-uh- I'm busy today. Yeah, so I can't clean, sorry," Kyung inched towards the front door with his hands fidgeting for the handle.

"You're lying," Taeil narrowed his eyes at him, "When I asked yesterday, you said you didn't have any plans today."

Kyung cursed at his past self for leaving his current self without an alibi. He still had the option to just run, though, so that's what he tried to do.

He flung open the door and made a break for it down the hall. He wasn't the most athletic, but last he remember, he was slightly faster than Taeil, so hopefully he could make it.

Kyung heard the pounding footsteps of his demise first. Next thing he knew, he was sprawled on the ground of the hallway under Taeil.

"Save me!" Kyung wailed as he tried to escape from underneath Taeil. Unfortunately, Taeil was too strong and was holding him down with both hands.

"It'll only be bad if you make it bad!" Taeil yelled right back. They were probably waking up the entire complex, but Kyung found that he didn't particularly care when his sanity was at stake.

"It's torture!"

"It's necessary!"

Kyung screamed as he tried to escape from Taeil. He couldn't do Spring Cleaning, not again, not after last year.

"You're being a baby, come on! Not even Jaehyo threw this much of a fit," Taeil wrestled Kyung's flailing limbs so they were pinned to the ground along with the rest of his body.

"Jaehyo might as well be dead this early in the morning," Kyung spat. There was a thick silence as the two glared at each other.

After a moment or two, Kyung made another attempt to escape, but his wriggling didn't get him far until Taeil pressed both of his forearms into Kyung chest and stared him straight in the eyes.

"You're being ridiculous," he hissed.

"It's literal hell," Kyung said with the most serious expression he's ever had. Spring Cleaning is no laughing matter.

Taeil pursed his lips in thought. A beat of silence passed until he said, "If you help with Spring Cleaning, I'll convince Jiho to let you get the bridge in our next song."

Kyung squinted at Taeil, trying to decide if he was bluffing or not.

"I promise," Taeil lifted his right arm off Kyung's chest to hold out his pinky.

Kyung glanced down at the pinky before looking Taeil in the eyes and hooking his own pinky around it.

"Fine."

Taeil got off of Kyung and helped him up. Before he could even think about running, though, Taeil grabbed his collar (roughly, he might add) and led him back to the dorm.

Jaehyo was exactly where they left him, but the coffee cup was now empty and he looked a lot less miserable than when they left. Taeil locked the door behind them and gave Kyung a glare that may or may not have made him fear the man before heading to the back of the dorm to find more cleaning supplies.

"Why didn't you try to run?" Kyung asked as he sat next to Jaehyo. Jaehyo's usually the first to bolt when it comes to Spring Cleaning, the lazy bastard (despite his looks, he's fast and limber, which makes him harder to catch. Last year, he almost got to the train station until Jiho was able to tackle him).

Jaehyo looked at Kyung wordlessly, then jerked his head downwards. He took the hint and looked under the table. There, Kyung saw Jaehyo's ankle tied to the leg of the table with a scarf. Jaehyo could do a lot of things, but untying Taeil's boy scout worthy knots or fitting a table through a door are not two of those things.

"Oh," was all Kyung could say.

"I don't know how he got me in the kitchen without waking me up," he sounded absolutely broken, but then again, today is Spring Cleaning, "He even changed me without me knowing."

Jaehyo looked like he was about to cry or have an existential crisis or both, so Kyung put his hand on his shoulder in comfort.

"Maybe since not as many of us are in the dorm this year, it won't be as bad," he offered. Both of them knew it was a bluff at best.

Taeil interrupted their very touching moment by coming back with rags and garbage bags and putting them in the buckets. He wordlessly walked over to the two and laid his palms flat on the table. Kyung heard Jaehyo gulp and he was inclined to agree. (It had been the topic of many conversations that Taeil could be intimidating as fuck and he could definitely make it as a gangster if he really wanted to).

"If either of you try to escape or not do work, I will personally see to it that your careers as idols are completely ruined. I have enough dirt on the both of you to make it so you can never show your faces in Korea ever again," Taeil looked both of them in the eyes and then asked slowly, "Do you understand?"

"Yes sir," they both said. Kyung had to bite the tip of his tongue so he wouldn't cry or scream.

"Jaehyo," Jaehyo sat up straighter and his pupils contracted at the sound of his name. He was terrified and no one couldn't blame him.

"Do you promise not to run if I untie you?" Taeil asked. There was only one right answer in this situation, and thankfully Jaehyo gave that right answer with a small nod.

Taeil nodded back and reached under the table to untie Jaehyo. With one tug, the knot was gone and they really had to wonder where Taeil learned to tie knots.

"Okay, first things first. We should start in the kitchen since we're already here and then we can move onto the living room," Taeil surveyed the kitchen with puckered lips and his hands on his hips. They had their work cut out for them.

 

* * *

 

 "What the fuck is this?" Kyung asked (yelled is more like it).

"What are you talking about?" Jaehyo asked from his position from inside the oven. Since he had the longest arms, he was given the task of cleaning the hard-to-reach places. To 'protect' his hair, he somehow found a bandana and tied it in a way that reminded Kyung of a stereotypical mom that you'd see in an anime.

"This," Kyung pointed to the very concerning green thing that was growing out of a crack in the tile in the corner of the kitchen. Taeil came over to look at the vibrant green blob and his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"It looks like mold," he said and poked his apprehensively with his toe. "Why is there mold in the kitchen?" He shot an accusing glare at Kyung and Jaehyo, who was now out of the oven and studying the supposed mold with everyone else.

"Did you spill something and not clean it up?"

"What? No! Do you think I was raised in a barn?" Jaehyo looked absolutely offended that anyone would even suggest such a notion.

Taeil turned to look at Kyung.

"Why would I spill something and not clean it up? Honestly, I think it was Jihoon," Kyung said.

"Well Jihoon isn't here, so who's going to clean it up?" Jaehyo asked. They all looked down at the slime in thought.

"Nose goes."

There was a moment of confused silence until the rush of three people trying to not be the last person to touch their nose happened.

"Jaehyo-hyung has to clean it!" Kyung laughed mockingly. Jaehyo was flabbergasted with his eyes wide and unblinking as his mouth hung open in shock.

"No!" He sounded genuinely hurt. Kyung and Taeil would have felt sympathetic if it wasn't for the fact that neither of them want to clean up the green goo in fear that it would horribly mutate them.

All Taeil did in response was go over to one of the buckets that was still in the living room only to come back with something that smelt like hydrogen peroxide and a rag and the words, "Remember, if you don't clean, I will ruin you."

Jaehyo grumbled to himself as he took the bleach and rag. He sunk to his knees and just looked at the green whatever-the-fuck-it-is in despair.

"You know," Kyung smiled smugly, "I like you a lot better when you're on your knees."

"If you get any closer to me I will not hesitate to bite your dick off," Jaehyo looked up at Kyung (for once in his life) with nothing but bitterness.

 

* * *

 

  Kyung looked up at the top shelf on the closet with a frown. After cleaning the kitchen- except Jaehyo, who was still scrubbing at the green whatchamacallit ("It's smudging," he yelled before they left)- and the living room, Taeil had given Kyung the job of dusting the house while he sorted through the towels. He had gotten practically everywhere in the dorm easily enough, but now, with the very highest shelf in the apartment looking down at him, he thinks Taeil appointed him to this job just to spite him.

Kyung isn't a tall person. He's proud of his height, as small as it may be, but sometimes he thinks the world is out to get him and people like him. Such times are when facing something well over 200 centimeters in height. Such as this shelf he needs to dust.

Is it possible for someone to fight a shelf? Or at least show it who's boss. If Kyung could reach it, that is.

His fingers barely brushed against the edge of the shelf, how is he going to dusk the entire thing? They don't have a step ladder, usually Jaehyo is tall enough to get whatever is out of reach for Taeil and Kyung.

Jaehyo won't help him, he's still upset because of the comment Kyung made. Taeil is even shorter than Kyung, so he won't be of any help even if he wants to (he doesn't). So he is left with the problem of “How the fuck do I finish dusting and not have Taeil yell at me for not working?”

He already tried shimmying up the wall like some kind of un-cool spiderman, but the wood creaked under the combination of his weight and the pressure his hands and feet were putting on it, and he definitely didn't want to break the fucking door frame, so he dropped down as soon as he could. He also tried climbing up the lower shelves as a makeshift ladder, but he faced a similar problem of breaking those too, so he opted out of that option when he heard a crack.

"I hate you and everything you stand for," Kyung glared up at the shelf (he had to lean his head back to even look at the damn thing, god damnit) after his many (2) failed attempts at cleaning.

Fuck it, it's not like Taeil will notice anyways.

 

* * *

 

 "Taeil-hyung you can't do it by yourself!" Jaehyo gasped. He finally finished cleaning up the green whatever in the kitchen ("If I become a mutant because of this I'm blaming you two.") and found Taeil so he could receive his next chore.

"Someone has to do it, and neither of you will do it properly so that leaves me," he was surprisingly calm, considering the daunting task ahead of him. His jaw was set in determination, but his hands still trembled and they all could see the tears threatening in the corners of his eyes.

"Yeah, but it's the bathroom," Kyung's voice was hushed, almost like he was scared that even mentioning the cursed place would bring hell on him.

No one really blames his caution, though, especially taking into mind what happened every Spring Cleaning. The first year, way back in 2012, Minhyuk had volunteered to clean the bathroom, but he came out a few minutes later with tears in his eyes and smelling like lemons and bleach, his entire shirt stained with cleaner and water (bleach had also gotten in his hair and that was an experience trying to explain to the manager). He refused to talk about what happened.

The year following, Yukwon tried his luck, but somehow he broke the mirror and the entire room was covered in glass and blood. Jihoon nearly cried. The year after that, Jaehyo had taken the task, but ended up breaking the toilet and the year after that Jiho had a similar problem with getting his foot stuck in the same appliance. Jihoon was lucky he moved out before it was his turn to take his try in cleaning the bathroom. (Yukwon says the reason Minhyuk moved out first was because he didn't want to have flashbacks to what happened to him every year).

"It doesn't matter. It has to get done," Taeil closed his eyes in a silent prayer. When he opened them again, they were hard with the acceptance that he may not make it out alive.

Jaehyo caught his hand before he went in, "If you need help in there," his voice was soft, like he was talking to a child, "don't call for us."

Taeil nodded, patted Jaehyo's hand, and slowly moved it away from his own. "If I don't make it, keep Jihoon away from my fish," with that, the bathroom door slammed behind him and he was gone.

"He's gonna die in there," Kyung said.

"Oh, definitely," Jaehyo nodded.

 

* * *

 

Taeil ended up coming out alive- not covered in blood or smelling like bleach, mind you- but he was slightly shaken from the experience.

While Taeil was occupied with the bathroom, though, Jaehyo had cleaned the windows (with a vinegar-based cleaner that left streak marks so he had to go back over every window twice) and Kyung (reluctantly) scrapped the bird poop off the balcony.

"Jaehyo," Taeil called for him once he was done staring off into the distance in the hallway. His voice was still just slightly shaky from his bathroom experience.

"Yes, hyung?" Jaehyo did his best to use whatever charm he had on Taeil- which included hunching his shoulders as he approached him to appear smaller and tilting his head down so that his eyes looked bigger than they really were- so that he wouldn't have to do anything too extreme (like cleaning the bathroom).

"You and Kyung have a job that you need to do."

"What's the job?" Kyung asked. He had heard his name and decided to join in the conversation from the open door to the small balcony.

Taeil wordlessly pointed to Kyung's room.

"No."

"We can't!"

"It's way too dangerous, hyung, we might be killed!"

"While you two are cleaning Kyung's room, I'll be cleaning the fish tank, and I don't think either of you want to be in the room for that because if any of my fish get hurt, we're gonna have to scout a replacement for the Block B member that mysteriously disappeared."

 

**Author's Note:**

> idk what was suppose to happen next tbh probs smthn like kyungie and jaehyo makin out idk and idc


End file.
